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Complete and utter catastrophe - manjushra
Complete and utter catastrophe

Both food habits have completely failed. Where did they go? Why was it possible before and impossible now? How do I get back into the mindset where it was possible?

I was reading some notes I made on relapse prevention, and noted particularly that initiation of change and maintenance of change are completely different things. This is true. My notes then go on to encourage the client to see each lapse as an exercise in self-education, rather than a reason to give up and die.

My gym habit is good. I have totally got into going to the gym. I am starting to wear closer fitting vest tops and shorts, and occasionally think I look ok when I glimpse myself lifting kettlebells in the mirror. The staff know me. I feel comfortable being surrounded by muscle-bound guys working out. (Not difficult.)


I've considered going back to the start, giving up bread for 30 days, with no other goals. But that doesn't cut it. It isn't what I want. What I want is to give up bread, flour products and sugar and eat 1000 cals per day. Why do I not do this, if I want it?


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artw From: artw Date: July 15th, 2016 09:00 am (UTC) (Link)
All that follows is just an opinion which might be incorrect:

1) If I remember correctly, 1000 cals was a 'losing weight' diet rather than a 'status quo' diet, right? That being so, you have hit against the reason why Weight Watchers will never go out of business. Your body has evolved to try not to starve. That's why it's fundamentally different from giving up caffeine or alcohol, neither of which was keeping you alive. After a little while on a diet, your metabolism changes and the urge to eat grows stronger. We have a friend who is a retired professional MMA fighter. (That's how cool we are). She said getting her weight down for a fight was fine, but in the long haul 'human will-power is a limited commodity'. She's one of the most driven people I know. It may be that you achieve more long-term change by taking smaller steps.

2) As far as your health is concerned, the gym habit is a really important success. Give yourself credit for it.

3) You've written about comfort eating and not having enough fun things to look forward to. I think that might be a useful area to explore. I have just been reading a book by the very American Byron Katie, and there are similar ideas in Anthony de Mello's 'Awareness' which is near the top of my 'books that changed my life' list. Far more important than your physical health is the way you investigate the stories you tell yourself and recognise that some of them are distortions which cause you pain. When you are happy just the way you are, then you will change.
manjushra From: manjushra Date: July 15th, 2016 02:59 pm (UTC) (Link)
Perhaps you would bring those books with you to Loughbrickland? I'd be interested in having a read.

I've had a better couple of days since writing that. I think hearing both voices which are at war within me is useful.
artw From: artw Date: July 16th, 2016 10:47 am (UTC) (Link)
Actually the Byron Katie book was borrowed from a friend and I had to give it back, so I've ordered it from Amazon. It's going to your address - saves me postage. If you find you like it, it's a thank-you-for-coming-to-visit-us present, and if it doesn't work for you, it's a loan.
manjushra From: manjushra Date: July 21st, 2016 09:01 am (UTC) (Link)
Book arrived - thank you so much! Really excited to read it. :-)
artw From: artw Date: July 21st, 2016 09:28 am (UTC) (Link)
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